February 3, 2017
Super Bowl gambling fun go
far beyond those office pools
By KEITH GAVE
Welcome to the silly season, when everybody is a gambler in the office pool and even the boss looks the other way if you let her buy a couple of squares, too, and the whole damned country takes a break from the politics of hatred to watch a football game for the commercials and root for ourselves – hoping for a miracle that one of the quarters ends so our 5-5 square earns us a payoff.
But go ahead and admit it: After the absolute bedlam this week over National Signing Day, when we celebrate all that ass-kissing of 17-year-old seniors by multi-million-dollar-a-year college coaches, the Super Bowl feels almost anti-climactic, doesn’t it?
Super Bowl is only a few days away. Atlanta and New England in the 51st edition of the game in Houston. Are you ready? Wouldn’t you like at least one more week of ridiculous hype to help get you fully prepared?
Me neither. Let’s get the game over with so we can get down to the truly serious part of the NFL season: mock drafts.
In the meantime, since we’re all gamblers this time of year, let’s review some of the more interesting “prop bets” available that require not a single bit of football acumen. Here are 10 to liven up your Super Bowl party, courtesy of some of the bigger books in Las Vegas and Europe:
* What will Luke Bryan be wearing when he starts singing the U.S. national anthem? Blue Jeans 1/2 or any other pants or shorts 3/2 (Bovada)
* How long will it take for Bryan to perform the song? Sportsbook.ag has the over/under at 2 minutes, 7 1/2 seconds, but Bookmaker.eu had it at exactly 2 minutes, while Bovada set the over/under at 2 minutes, 15 seconds.
* Heads or tails on the coin flip? Heads, -102; Tails -102 (Westgate)
* How many times will ‘Trump’ be said on TV during broadcast? Over/Under 1½ (Bovada)
* Will ‘Houston, we have a problem’ be said on TV during live broadcast? Yes, 5/2; No, 5/2 (Bovada)
* What color will Lady Gaga's hair be when she comes on stage for the halftime show? Blonde, 1/4; Any other Color, 5/2 (Bovada)
* Which song will Lady Gaga play first during the halftime show? "Born this Way" 9/4; "Bad Romance" 5/2; “Edge of Glory" 6/1; "Poker Face" 10/1; "Just Dance" 10/1; "Any other song" 11/10 (Bovada)
* How many times will ‘deflate’ or ‘Deflategate’ be said on TV during live broadcast? Over 1½ Even (or 1/1); Under 1½ -140 (or 5/7) (Bovada)
* How many times will Gisele Bundchen be shown on TV during the broadcast? Over 1½ +110 (11/10); Under 1½ -150 (2/3) (Bovada)
* What color will the liquid be that is poured on the winning coach? Clear 3/1; Lime/green 3/1; Orange 3/1; Yellow 3/1; Red 6/1; Blue 15/2; Purple 12/1
Place your bets – and good luck. And if you don’t like these, there are dozens more to choose from. Just Google Super Bowl 2017 prop bets, and knock yourself out.
Oh, and since there’s an actual football game that even a few people outside New England and Georgia actually care about, we should mention that the Patriots are 3-point favorites, a number that hasn’t wavered much even though oddsmakers say 68 percent of the money being bet is on New England.
The over-under started at 60, moved briefly to 61 and has settled at 59, a staggeringly high number for a Super Bowl. Oddsmakers are saying 60 percent of the money bet on this proposition is on the over.
It’s hard to bet against quarterback Tom Brady and his coach Bill Belicheck and all their experience in this game, but I’m doing it anyway. Falcon’s quarterback Matt Ryan and his offense are having a magical season that will end with a 34-30 Atlanta win. So I’m taking the over, too.
Oh, and one more prop bet: Bovada will also let you place your money on who the Super Bowl MVP will mention first in his interview after winning the award: God, 2/1; Teammates, 2-1; Coach, 9/1; Family, 9/1; Owner, 9/1; Donald Trump, 20/1; None of the above, 5/2. (Hint, God is always the safe bet here.)